People are so funny. And by people I mean me.
The first novel in my Bigfoot series has been released. Bigfoot Blues. The novel looks at how we all have to chart our own path through whatever culture we’re born into. Pick and choose what to embrace as our own, what to ignore, and what to reject outright.
So, the book is not precisely about Bigfoot, but rather set in the heart of the Bigfoot hunter culture. (and, yes, culture IS the word I want to use there) Those of you who follow this blog know that Bigfoot has a strong childhood connection and adult interest for me.
So, I sent Hunter Joe a copy of the novel and he asked me to be on his show.
Now, I am not a shy individual. I think nothing of prancing around a hotel room, making a happy fool of myself telling some story about a bungee cord or a lost monkey-fur coat. My usual thought process when speaking in front of groups, be they writers or rotary club, is that the worst that can happen is that I will fall on my face with my skirt over my head. In which case I’ll have a really funny story to tell the next time I speak.
Except, Hunter Joe does a very professional job with his blog talk. Very pro-fes-sion-al. He sent me a promotion sheet that, when I added up all the numbers, revealed that my live/uncut/just-as-I-opened-my-giant-mouth-and-said-it voice would be going out to thousands. Yes that’s right, thousands of people.
I panicked. That’s right. Me. Have mouth, will travel.
My heart played a doomsday tune, my hands were clammy, my throat dry.
Right up until the moment I heard Hunter Joe’s voice on the phone for the interview.
Then I was as calm and happy as a well-fed toddler. I had a terrific time doing the interview. Sarge and Hunter Joe and ParaAnne were great, made the whole experience fun. All was well.
Until, once it was over, I clicked the button to replay the broadcast.
The moment my voice came out the speaker system, my hand reached across the keyboard like a striking cobra and shut down the computer.
Stop! Oh, Hell No! Get that OFF before I have rip off my ears!
So, okay a full day has elapsed and I’ve been a giant baby and made all my friends listen to the broadcast several times over and reassure me that I was funny and interesting and, well, just plain brilliant.
I’m just about ready now to put on my big-girl panties and hit play.
Here’s my question for you. Why, when most of do so love to hear ourselves talk, why than does the sound of our own voice coming through a speaker system, be it Karaoke or blog talk radio or the telephone answering machine, make us want to run screaming into the woods?