Flapping Hands and Ordinary Times.

Brown / Grizzly Bear, Lake Clark National Park, Alaska.

Facebook depresses me.  It’s like one of those endless, lie-filled missives from family and acquaintances that comes each year thinly disguised as a Christmas letter.  Except I get to look forward to Facebook every single day.

I mean seriously, NOBODY does that well all the time.  It’s like the damn posts are designed to make me feel inadequate.

“Gosh.  No sense in my feeling down over my petty little problem when perky cousin pain-in-the-ass buried her dog and husband on the same day and still felt good enough to run a marathon and feed the orphans.”

Oh, look, she posted pictures.

Isn’t that precious?  Bless her heart.

There’s no way I can compete, stopped trying a while back when I discovered that, no matter how much fun I’m having at an event, all the pictures of me are going to reveal a crazy person.  I talk with my hands so every photo is going show me flapping my arms in the air.  Haven’t had a picture taken of me in ten years that I wasn’t either talking or laughing or eating.

I haven’t been a practicing Catholic in years.  The reason for that will, no doubt, find its way into a novel at some point. A very long novel.  So, while you aren’t going to find me on my knees in front of priest, I do still love the church calendar.  The church has lent and Pentecost and Christmas.  All the rest is ordinary times.  I love that phrase.  Ordinary times.

It’s not the highs or the lows I object to people posting on Facebook, it’s the lack of balance.  We all have bad days and good days.  I want balance.  I want truth.  I want ordinary times revealed.

Well, as my dad used to tell me, people in hell wantin’ ice water too.

So, at the risk of asking the devil for a refreshing beverage, tell me what you love and what you hate about Facebook or about social media in general.  I mean, we all post and gripe and keep going back for more.  So, ‘fess up.  What do you love or hate about social media?

And here’s another challenge.  Anybody, I mean anybody, have a picture of me when my mouth isn’t open, my eyes aren’t crossed and my hands aren’t a blur?


About Author and Speaker Pamela Foster

Pamela Foster is a speaker and author. Her first book, Redneck Goddess, is available at local bookstores and on Amazon. Her second book, Bigfoot Blues, will be available in August 2012.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

10 Responses to Flapping Hands and Ordinary Times.

  1. Linda Apple says:

    Okay, I’m shifting into Momma Apple mode. Did you listen to me AT ALL yesterday????

    /Users/lindaapple/Pictures/iPhoto Library/Previews/2011/Dec 9, 2011/DSC_0030.JPG

  2. Linda Apple says:

    Rats, I thought that photo would come up. Okay, well I’ll leave it on your FB. 🙂

  3. I’m laughing with you as I imagine we know people with parallel traits. I’ve un-friended people more for those in eternal misery mostly of their own making as I find my silent voice screaming back to the invisible, useless wall. I refuse to offer insights most of the time, especially to those who are now on my last nerve. Especially since they didn’t ASK 😉

  4. Now why would anyone want to air all their dirty laundry on FB? If you want that, find a therapy group. FB is about cats and grandbabies and shameless self-promotion, with inspiring quotes thrown in for the rest of us. Is it what it is, and like most people, not 100% authentic all the time. There is a Facebook Ex-pats group on WANATribe if it gets to be too much. xxoo

  5. FB can be annoying at times. I try to post in a balanced manner: my ups, my downs (as long as they aren’t too private), cute stuff my kid said, random gripes. I do have a couple of FB friends who constantly speak well of themselves online as if it’s some great marketing opportunity. It’s not. The only reason I’m on FB is because my friends are scattered across the globe, a result of my itinerant lifestyle.

    • Hey Sean. It’s all about balance, I guess. I have found several friends I’d lost touch with over the years as a result of FB. As with everything, I suppose, as you say, we do the best we can ourselves and ignore what annoys the crap out of us.

      • I have different accounts on FB for these reasons: Part of me is protecting the image I like to think I project. Parts of me are more ornery or a bit racier than some of my long ago friends might expect. There are issues I want to explore and comment on that are none of someone else’s business and I don’t want a collision of those topics to muddy the waters of who I believe myself to be. The web and FB has a forever memory and something I might post on a down day might cause someone to comment in a manner that I am long past by the time their comments are returned to me. The last thing I go on FB for is to fight with anyone. I do have friends whose lives revolved around pointing out what is wrong with the world and I can do that just fine by myself thank you. I’m more interested in, “How are you working to help change that,” as I think we can all point out where life is just wrong. It takes a choice in attitude to choose what to post and I have deleted people for their constant “poor me” attitude or bickering. I don’t tolerate rudeness and expect anyone can respond, but they can do it respectfully. Mostly I go into FB to find other uplifting ideas to nourish my brain and my soul. I’ve reconnected with friends from long ago school days, met people I’d never have met in 3-D and likely never will, but can choose the friends I do as carefully as I might choose who I share my energy with in the nearby circles.

  6. JoAnn, you make a good point that FB, like most of life, is what we make it. Thanks for sharing this.

  7. Mark D says:

    Well people are very different as for me with agoraphobia to almost all people who are near me in my sight and disgust with societies norms in any social relation, a real social life is not worth having at all, only the action that cared brought me desire to associate with anyone, and more rarely a feeling of personal sabotage to think suffering brought me any greater wisdom, which it does not it only teaches me why it’s better to live in isolation.

    I learn to accept the kindness of others in my life, large and more importantly small to see and feel the care of myself and others, the only thing that makes it worth existing outside in the real world, and not some tragic fake social media system, and sometimes the fake book media services are often designed to show the best of us, and sure I do like to share the deepest learning experiences, but really few bother to care that you had one as you did not have any experience with them, After all its called a book of faces, and not social of relations.

    a social life with real people on fake book is delusional, if you elect to express how you feel it’s likely no one would respond, who cares if you are blue or down, and worse if you express outrage or an intellectual thought you are likely to get insulted and hear disapproval it’s a shot in the dark with fake book. Fake book keeps positive but people are there to feel connected to someone as many at the time they go there do not feel connected with anyone, that is why they are there. Who the hell would rather feel connected on fake book, if you already felt connected with real people, but sure fake book, is way better than fake people, so what you goanna do? I play games on fake book, that is where fake book is getting their income these days.

    Social media might provide social mobility who have alternative motive, but as for me, it’s better to be familiar with strangers and face book does that for me. Face book is more diplomatic than friendly, better it just say anthropological interest in character and parties, I would think to have over 1,000 face book friends maybe two or three have lasted over a year to which I have received a message once a month or more times sharing with them. I do not think anyone should suffer the illusion social media is social at all, and far more just a different kind of propaganda which manages to stay more positive as ideal even if that makes it fake.

    Those who are popular simply have a real social life and so what do you know they have only the appearance face book is a real social media service, but it’s not that simple they have many friends in the real world, so really face book is useful to the degree to which you already have social relation without it, but I would think it provide anthropological interests at least you can study people, but I am finding blogs to be a better place I found most people in the real world lame and fake book is just a faker version of lame people. So I have given up on people in general , one share interests in a greater diversity on a blog and then the interest becomes the subject matter, and not the person, I did try many times to be social with them, but they all war and debate and fight with me, and it just stresses me out, I hate debate, I hate taking a position others object too, If I do I would think it healthy for the sake of care and compassion for society. face book makes a huge deal out of the person and not the interests let alone to any care to the people in general.

    Social media is a joke, like face book they share the notion of people instead of interests and you can study their interest and group them together to create ‘personality profiles’ but social relationships? hell no, apart from getting to understand thousands of people as a ‘Profile’, Which I have done for long enough to have contempt for most of them seeing the patterns of human nature, I would think I feel less connected to them than I would feel connected to a total stranger. I enjoy association with underdogs and the suffering of others, but only to understand them enough to find some method future or present to help them. I find it ideal to never have any connections with the world, face book is careless and listless, so if you do not wish to be close to anyone face book is alright, just don’t call it social media, but those who substitute a real social life do use it often, and really I cannot blame them a lot are just like me, even some of the more popular people do not actual like being so popular so face book is a way of avoiding it.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s