Category Archives: grief

Love and Stripper Poles

This past Thursday evening was the last free concert-on-the-bay of the season. Jack and I attended all but one of these events. There were a slew of logistical challenges when he moved from the walker to the wheelchair. A lift … Continue reading

Posted in aging, caregiver, grief, health, Humboldt County, humor, marriage, Pamela Foster, Uncategorized, veterans, writer | Leave a comment

Juju Beads

My winding path to enlightenment, or more truthfully toward survival, is strewn with a discarded string of juju beads representing various religions and philosophies. I have at one time or another embraced Protestantism, Catholicism, Christian Fundamentalism, Humanism, and Skepticism. I’ve … Continue reading

Posted in aging, caregiver, grief, marijuana, Parkinson Disease, Progressive Supranuclear Palsy, pts, Uncategorized, veterans | Leave a comment

Hollering

A few days ago I started to write this ‘H’ post about hope. My intent was to incorporate healing into the mix. Look, it’s not like I don’t know that people can only take so much raw truth and pain … Continue reading

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Grief. And Guilt.

G is for grief. And it’s also for guilt. If I had been a better wife, if I had loved Jack more selflessly, more deeply, might I have prevented his brain from developing Progressive Supranuclear Palsy? Is it possible that, … Continue reading

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Forgetting

Forgetting our past is terrifying. Our experiences, our memories are who we are, how we identify ourselves. Part of the progressive supranuclear palsy from which Jack suffers is dementia. But, not the loss of memory associated with Alzheimer’s disease. No, … Continue reading

Posted in aging, grief, health, nursing home, Pamela Foster, Parkinson Disease, Progressive Supranuclear Palsy, pts, Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Death

D is for death. Not Jack’s death. Ultimately, that will be his with which to deal. I want to talk today about my own death, and the 70% chance that I will die before Jack. That’s the statistic. 70% of … Continue reading

Posted in aging, calcium, caregiver, grief, health, heartburn, Parkinson Disease, Progressive Supranuclear Palsy, pts, Uncategorized, veterans, writer | 1 Comment

Bitter

“Woman’s virtue is man’s greatest invention.” Germaine Greer Four years ago – when Jack began falling, when I first noticed the tremor in his left hand, when his vision began to deteriorate faster than the VA could order him new … Continue reading

Posted in aging, caregiver, grief, health, marriage, Pamela Foster, Progressive Supranuclear Palsy, Uncategorized | 2 Comments